28-Day Pit Stop (February)
On the 28th day of each month (in honor of PMS and that whole menstrual cycle thing), we make a Pit-Stop to rally support for each other during a particular moment of PSM.
Submit a comment with your experience. Yours may be just the inspiration or the support or the laugh a PSM sister needs!! (Remember, the "Parlor" is up here. I hope this is another way we can connect.)
This month's little adventure is entitled "Meetup Mayhem". In October 2010, I started a local PSM chapter here in Indianapolis, using the Website, http://www.meetup.com/, to attract members. We now have 17 PSMers, which sounds small, but it's just the way we like it. I have met, and, better yet, connected with, some wonderful, unique, vibrant, and inspiring women coming into their own and can't wait to meet more. One of my PSM goals is to have local meetup chapters all over the country. If you would like to get involved in that, please leave a comment or email me at psm@psming.com.
A great, well-intentioned gal in the PSM group started her own group for single empty-nesters, which now has over 50 members. I love the idea of we humans meeting and connecting in any way possible, and I signed up in solidarity. But this is where the happy little story takes a sharp turn onto weirdness lane.
I'm an expert at being judgmental, so after a couple of events, I can already define the group as follows:
The Meetup Majors. This is the big league. These folks belong to umpteen groups and attend umpteen "meetups". They are busy, busy, busy. When they're not meeting up, they're talking about how much they meet up. It's common to see RSVPs on the Website that say, "I have a meetup at 7, but if it ends early, I'll stop in at 9, before my last meetup of the night at 10." Personally, I think this group is busy sharing mid-life medication to escape themselves.
The Senior Empty Nesters. I'm sorry, but if you are in your sixties and your children are in their thirties and procreating, you are NOT an empty nester. You're just old at a meetup. There are people in this group who haven't had kids at home for over ten years. There is a cutoff point, people. I don't know what it is exactly, but we cannot be in the nursing home going to meetups and calling ourselves empty nesters.
The Boys. My PSM group doesn't include men for a reason. Men are NOT empty nesters, nor are they Post-Single FATHERS (unless you're the five men in America who have actually raised your own children from start to finish and reading this, then please do forgive me). They don't experience the loss of children leaving home that women do. They just don't. First of all, single men are always on the huntdown for single women. And second of all, single men are always on the huntdown for single women. This group is no exception. Period. Their 20-something kids are just their opening line. (There are some real weirdos here, but this is not the time nor place. A couple of them deserve blog posts of their own.)
And the Women who Want to Meet Boys. This is the majority. I haven't heard this much talk about boys since the middle school cafeteria at lunchtime. It was exhausting then, and it's even more exhausting now. When I heard a 61-year-old woman talk about her despair about not finding a relationship after attending 33 meetups in the last 2 months, I wanted to slit not just my wrists for being forced to hear that, but hers for saying it.
All this brings me back to our little 17-member PSM chapter and how much it has benefited me in just these last five months. We are the truest of the empty nesters. We are war-decorated empty nesters -the four-star generals, if you will. Kudos to us for being genuine and strong and interesting and independent. For investigating our own interests and cultivating our own lives. I have high hopes for the PSM community, and I hope you'll stick with me while we nail things down together. Maybe we'll start with a little PSM Promise, like the Girl Scouts. On my honor, something, something, something. And the salute? Well, you can imagine. Maybe a Cheers or a finger. I'd like your input.
February's Pit Stop Suggestions:
www.meetup.com (use at your own risk)
Contact me, Ms.PSM/Karen, if you're interested in starting a PSMers chapter in your area
Inspirational Daily Email Messages from The Universe (what? there's an iPhone app, too?!!!)
Change your Mind and your Life will Follow (a whole chapter about not being judgmental - I skipped it)
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